Column 8: Cricket’s days are numbered

Column 8: Cricket’s days are numbered

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“Watching the Cricket World Cup, my wife and I were amused to see that Joe Root’s shirt was marked ‘Root 66’. Are the player numbers allocated purely by chance? If so, what are the odds?” asks Alan Marel of North Curl Curl.

The tales of Rip Torn (C8) continue. Kevin Harris of Beecroft says: “Sadly, the late, lamented Rip Torn was never cast alongside Gale Storm. One can only imagine what might have ensued had they had a love scene together.” And this … erm … ripper from Michael Sparks of Braddon (ACT): “Once when I lived in New York in the 1980s, I visited a friend who lived next door to the Chelsea townhouse of Rip Torn and his wife Geraldine Page. The sign next to their doorbell read Torn/Page. Simple, honest, yet poetic.”

“I believe the final word on the correct pronunciation (C8) of this word should go to the policeman reporting a stolen van in yesterday’s midday movie, ‘The Lavender Hill Mob’,” thinks Gary Heap of Bankstown. “After Alfie Bass had made off with the van full of bullion, the London bobby reported a stolen maroon-coloured van. He rhymed it with ‘moon’. If you can’t trust a bobby, who can you trust?” Granny couldn’t help but notice that the role of the policeman is credited to a David Davies. Wonder if it’s our favourite Callala Beach denizen?

Kersi Meher-Homji (C8) has been beaten. But not by much. Owen Fisher of Rose Bay “looked-up my scrapbook and found my first Column 8 entry was in August 1980. I had a hardware store in Rockdale and reported that two federal policemen asked me to engrave a large pewter mug with an inscription for a retiring colleague. The well-worded message was handed over the counter with great delicacy, written on a crumpled piece of toilet paper.”

Peter Riley of Penrith writes: “Wollongong University has just hosted a week-long Australasian Association of Philosophy Conference and in a group photo in the Illawarra Mercury, I see that the male philosophers all have beards and the female philosophers are mainly wearing black. As Descartes said: ‘I conform, therefore I am’.”

Speaking of inept names for cruise lines (C8), spare a thought for inappropriate themes. “Next year Cunard will stage a ‘Titanic’ cruise on the Queen Victoria. No doubt drink stewards will be instructed to ask ‘would you like ice with that?’,” says Garth Clarke of North Sydney.

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